Following this logic, men who don't cheat are first-class human beings. Over the years, I've met a few guys who cheat on their wives and an awful lot who don't. Or let's just say I think they don't.
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But is it possible that these husbands refrain from cheating not so much because they love their wives, and not even because they view cheating as immoral, but for other, less laudable reasons? Consider, if only for the sake of argument, the following explanations for why some men are faithful to their wives:. Men like to plop down on the couch and watch sports and drink beer. Romance, by contrast, is labor-intensive; you have to shower, shave, slap on some deodorant, put on something other than sweatpants, buy flowers, go to the movies, read a book every once in a while, think of compliments, engage in conversation.
Cheating on your wife involves travel, dinner reservations, booking hotel rooms. Once a man has been married a few decades , the energy he would need to expend on an extramarital affair could be a life-threatening shock to his nervous system. It would be like asking the Sahara to suddenly erupt in foliage. That's why so many older men wouldn't even think of cheating on their wives. It's too exhausting. Women swear up and down that looks are not nearly as important to them as they are to men, that a woman will not hesitate to marry an unattractive man if he has other compensatory qualities, such as a sense of humor or a highly developed intellect or a villa in Tuscany.
I only believe the part about the villa in Tuscany. I personally cannot recall the last time I saw an attractive woman with a hideous man, and I keep my eyes peeled for this sort of thing. You might see a 10 with an 8, or an 8 with a 5, but you never see a 9 with a 2. And that's the reason ugly men do not cheat on their wives.
An ugly man is so happy that he found one woman willing to gaze at his baleful countenance for the next 40 years that there is no way he is going to risk everything by cheating on her. Having an extramarital affair takes money. Even if you don't have to shell out for airplane tickets and hotel rooms, sooner or later you're going to have to pony up for meals, flowers, chocolates, theater tickets, lingerie.
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According to a Gallup poll, only 6 percent of Americans view cheating as acceptable. And 64 percent say that it is an unforgivable offense. Which means that the risks are enormous. Many men would cheat on their wives if they thought they could get away with it, but know that they can't get away with it because they're sloppy, forgetful, disorganized, dumb.
They're going to put the motel charge on their credit card instead of paying cash. Or they're going to pay cash for the three-hour day rate in the motel but forget to tell the seedy desk clerk in the Black Sabbath T-shirt not to put the minibar charges on the Visa. They're going to make too many late-night calls to the same mysterious phone number in Vegas or Amarillo or Buenos Aires.
They're going to get caught, they know they're going to get caught, and they don't want to have to deal with the consequences of getting caught. And that's why they don't cheat. If they coulda, they woulda. But they couldn't, so they didn't. And if your girlfriend lives in another city, the travel will eventually wear you down. Just because you'd like to cheat doesn't automatically mean that you're going to find someone willing to take you in. Much like the ugly guys, boring guys count their lucky stars that they were able to find one woman capable of staying awake while they moan about the latest Financial Accounting Standards Board standards or complain that no one ever plays Seals and Crofts or Bobby Vinton at weddings anymore.
Finding a second woman who would put up with this stuff can be a stretch. In proposing all this, I do not mean to disparage the millions and millions of men who remain scrupulously faithful to their wives because they love them, honor them, cherish them and can't imagine ever being unfaithful to them. Those guys are great; those guys rule the world. All I'm saying is that marital fidelity is not always the direct result of a romantic disposition or an ironclad values system. Some men would cheat on their wives — at least once — if they knew they could get away with it, if they didn't have to worry about the blowback e.
But in the final analysis, I suspect that some men don't cheat for the same reason that they don't water-ski: They're not really good at it, there's no learning curve for this sort of thing, and the results could be disastrous.
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Once you confirm that subscription, you will regularly receive communications related to AARP volunteering. In the meantime, please feel free to search for ways to make a difference in your community at www. Share with facebook. Share with twitter. Share with linkedin. Share using email. Josue Evilla One-woman men: People can surprise you, but these stars show every sign of being happily married to their first wives. Anonymous January 19th, pm. There is no one answer to this, it varies depending on the woman and her relationship experiences, certainly someone who believes that 'revenge is sweet' after being cheated on by her boyfriend will return the favor.
In another scenario, a woman who has been mistreated whether it be abuse or neglect may lean towards another man for emotional support I believe that our actions are linked to our needs and whether that need is comfort, revenge, or just space to be alone, we act in direct response to those needs.
Not all women cheat instead of breaking up, the woman or women who've done that to you had there own reasons for their actions and their responsible for it not you so don't blame yourself or all women, I know it's hard to believe right now but there's women out there who won't do that to you. Women aren't the only culprits here.
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Both men and women can sometimes get "sexually bored" and quite a few actually admit to having been a cheater at some point in their lives. It's human nature that we have to do our best to block out of our minds. All women are different, meaning that they all have different reasons as to why they would cheat. This goes for men too.
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I feel like people cheat instead of breaking up because they either don't want to hurt you by ending it or because they still want to keep you around. They want the best of both worlds. Is cheating right? NO not at all. I honestly feel like it should be illegal to cheat considering that they're diseases out there that you can get from doing so, but that still may not stop people from doing it.
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I would rather be broken up with before cheated on, but sometimes it just doesn't work like that. When you think you know someone , the truth is that you really don't. Always be cautious. Anonymous November 20th, pm. I'm a man , but I can say that it might be because there's a part inside them still loves you and don't want to lose you but they can't take it anymore and be completely involved in a relationship that stresses them out I undersand that by any means it's cheating and it has no any other definition, but that's what i think is the reason.
Women have a tendency to not want to be alone which is why they always prefer to have a back up plan, Of course it is not always the case, most often it is because they are in love with more than one person at once or are sex addicts. Anonymous January 26th, am. Some woman can cheat because she loves both men.
Sometimes, she may not want to break one of the guys hearts. There are quite a few reasons. Women are predominately disposed to seeking out what they lack in their relationship. Whether that's an emotional or physical void, I feel that women are more inclined to cheat based on their perceived lack of affection, physical intimacy, etc. They choose not to end the relationship because they feel it's something they can still work on.
Anonymous September 21st, am. I think that cheating is a sign that someone is insecure about themselves.